Very few of us embrace the process, many deny it and most – save for Brigitte Bardot – try to cheat it in some way. Next time you pee, use your puboccoccygeus muscle to hold the flow of urine Practise halting the flow several times each time you pee. This way, you can train yourself to slow the process to orgasm. “Control over rapid ejaculation is about becoming more tuned in to the process, not less,” says Paula Hall.* SEXERCISEKegel exercises – strengthening your “love muscle”, the puboccoccygeus muscle – will help to control ejaculation. Note how you feel as you near climax, then stop, breathing deeply, before you continue Repeat several times.
Contact Relate (0845 456 1310) for information.* TAKE CONTROLPractice makes perfect. This was pioneered by the sex scientists Masters and Johnson. If it’s done properly, many men find they can delay ejaculation almost indefinitely. It made me want to be able to do the same for other men.”Three ways to last longer* GET A GRIPSqueeze the penis just below the ridge of the glans (head) between the thumb and two fingers when close to climax. He chose his career in part because of his experiences involving lack of ejaculatory control.
“PE has been the single greatest factor in the formation of my character,” he says.”Using techniques to delay orgasm helped, but discovering that I could satisfy a woman sexually without penetrative sex is what finally cured me. Most women, however, don’t orgasm through penetrative sex alone, so these men may be chasing an elusive dream.Kerner is now a sex therapist. A study by the University of K? Germany, concluded that the notion of PE is more strongly linked to partner satisfaction than duration of sex.”Men are concerned about PE because they want to be able to bring their girlfriend or wife to orgasm during sex – if they come too soon, they can’t,” says Kerner. Furthermore, the solution often lies in explanation and instruction involving both partners, rather than using the illness model.”Men’s reluctance to discuss sexual concerns honestly can lead to a mistaken belief that there is a problem, leading to emotional stress and perhaps unnecessary treatment. “We class PE as being when it causes dissatisfaction in either partner, but this is open to interpretation.